nights like these
Nights like these, I struggle.
There are so many things that were ‘ours’. Places, music, inside jokes. I can’t listen to Andrew Bird without wanting to throw things. I can’t watch Star Trek or Big Bang Theory or Walking Dead without feeling ill. I catch myself giggling at something and realize there’s no longer anyone that understands why it’s even funny. It still hurts to breathe, nearly three months later.
I put up a pretty good front. Most of my friends kinda figure I’m long since over this phase of things. I don’t bother confiding because most of them never knew ‘us’ well to begin with. Most days I’m fine and then nights like these… I lose it.
The worst part? I know it’s a one-sided struggle. He moved on before he ever even told me goodbye.